“Your marriage is programmed into your heart.”

You and I live our lives from the platform of our hearts. Every issue in our hearts has its expression in our lives. How we act, react, plan, make decisions…our passions all have a common origin…our heart.

“As a man thinks in his heart so is he.” Prov 23:7


So every issue is a heart issue.  The marriage you are going to have has already been programmed into your heart.  Isn’t that scary? Your heart is the seat of your belief system. 

“Guard your heart for out of it flows the issues of life.” (Prov 4:23) 

How we handle conflict is programmed.  The conditions under which we forgive is programmed.  How love is to be shown to us is programmed.

God allows our everyday relationships to smooth our rough edges “Until I do.”

Years before marriage, I was adamant that I would not submit to any man…after all why should I have to? Submit meant allowing someone to rule over and control me. That was absolutely not going to happen!  I didn’t have any serious relationships to express this strong position I held.

Thank God I didn’t!!  It would have been catastrophic.  Raised by a single mom, as the last of six, I was taught independence.  My brother-in-law and only male mentor spent hours trying to soften me up to the concept.  In my heart I held on to how overpowering, dominating and disappointing male figures were growing up. Why then would saunter down the isle, arm raised saying “I do” to that? 

In my heart was a fear that only love could conquer.  My brother-in-law modeled this love in a most irrefutable way.  He loved my sister and honored her day in day out.  I had to admit that submission was not looking so dreadful.  He took the time to teach me that submission in marriage was as the love between Christ and his bride the Church – the very Church He died for.  In addition, man was given the mandate to lay down his life for his wife.  When I learnt more about submission, I had no problem submitting to love. 

Do you see how my heart’s position would have impacted my marriage had I not changed my mind? 

“Until I do”…see about evicting some squatters from your precious heart.

Somethings we’re adamant about holding on to are holding us back.